Transcript
WEBVTT
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It's kind of obnoxious.
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It is obnoxious.
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Fucking heater works.
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Yeah, it does.
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Are you ready?
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Yep.
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All right, captain One two.
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This podcast is intended for mature audiences only If you are not 18 years of age or older.
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There are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18.
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This podcast is meant solely for entertainment.
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We are not licensed doctors, lawyers or therapists.
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We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and I'd love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.
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Welcome back.
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There it is.
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I'm laying in bed with my subbie.
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Yeah.
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And that wonderful ticking you hear is my fantastic diesel heater keeping us toasty warm.
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I probably could have turned that off while we did this.
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That's fine.
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Ignore the ticking or enjoy it if you enjoy ASMR.
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Yeah, I mean, there is that.
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So this episode is going to be a topic that I have no idea what it is, because Subby here heard something said we've never done an episode on this before, but didn't want to tell me what it of this conversation actually came from the couples meeting last night and I was talking to my good friend Steven.
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So shout out to Steven, Steven, so shout out to Steven and if you're interested in the couples meeting, it used to be the ladies night thing, right.
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I just call it the ladies slash men's group.
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Yeah, ladies, men's group, couples group, whatever Jump over to the old Patreon and check it on out.
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Second Thursday of every month.
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And hey, there's a new thing going on over there, isn't there?
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Oh, yes, the question of the day.
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Yeah, let me rewind a little bit.
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Second Thursday of every month is the group.
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You have to be a member of the $10 tier, correct, and I post the link, and we all get together in the beginning and then we separate the men into the breakout room, the ladies have a chat, and then we bring the boys back.
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Right, they shoo us away and then beckon us back.
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We kick them out and reel them back in, as it should be.
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The question of the day is something that I'm offering to everyone.
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I post it for even the free members to interact, because I want to get to know you so I will post a question and you answer.
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I do see that I got some responses on today's.
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Today was a busy day.
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I was doing interviews and getting jobs and doing all the things.
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So, yep, I have not had a chance to respond, but I intend on doing so in the morning and this act.
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The genesis of that actually came from you, discovering there's a whole gaggle of free members.
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Yes.
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That you weren't necessarily aware of.
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Yeah, I should learn Patreon better, so hey, free Patreon members.
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that don't really get much, but you're there anyways, thank you.
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Yeah, and thanks for interacting the people that have interacted already.
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I appreciate you.
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Yeah, Just to let you know, there's a lot more available at those upper tiers for not very much.
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So there is that.
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Are we done?
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Promoting ourselves?
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Yes, okay, what's the topic?
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I just wanted to cover that.
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Yep, that would be like housekeeping.
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Yeah, Probably put that in for free for real, not for free.
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For free, you'll get that free too.
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I'll put that in for real.
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Okay, I've been thinking about this for a little while off and on, for quite a while off and on, and it sparked because of my conversation with Steven last night.
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Okay, we have not specifically for us talked about.
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Are you ready?
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Fucking, hanging on every word.
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Domestic discipline.
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Yes, we have.
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No, we haven't yes we have, we talked oh.
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No, specifically for us.
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Oh, creating the routine or creating the environment or what that looks like for us.
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Because, because, do you know what sparked it last night?
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What Is that?
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He was talking about Judy keeping track of things right, and he brought up a specific thing where he snapped this is where your idea came from too, isn't it?
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What do you mean?
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The whole idea that we were talking about today in the car.
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What was my idea in the?
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car.
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Oh, for Christ's sakes, stay tuned.
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We'll have this conversation off the microphone, oh, but you will be cued in soon.
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Okay, printing and.
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Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah, okay, oh, that's, oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah, okay, that's ooh.
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Way to kind of peel back the cover of that for a second, something special and new coming soon.
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Yes, okay, so Judy can be tracked.
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Anyways, anyways.
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So he had snapped or barked at her, but it didn't have anything to do with her.
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It had to do with his current irritation with something.
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But regardless, that's not really a defense necessarily.
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So I mean, let's talk in real time.
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Moments ago, just seconds before you walked into our bedroom, I had stepped into a large cold puddle of water with my sock.
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I would have lost my mind.
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I would have burnt the bus down.
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While you wouldn't no, I wouldn't While trying to put something away and I'm over here trying to be helpful and I stepped in this thing and I was very irritated by that, because now I'm basically laying in bed with a cold, wet sock, which I mean, it's really not that bad you could take them off there are people going through far worse than I am right now.
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I will be okay, you know I'm not starving, you know.
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Anywho, he mentioned that and I thought to myself fuck, I do that a lot, and probably too much.
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Where I snap at you, I bark at you or something like that.
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It's uncalled for, thank you Steven.
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What.
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I said thank you Steven.
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Oh yeah, Thank you, steven.
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I said thank you Steven.
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Oh yeah, thank you Steven.
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So I feel like we should implement.
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I'm on board.
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Fuck.
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Yes, it's fuck yes, february.
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Fuck yeah, february.
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That's for everyone.
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We're on the board.
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Yep, fuck.
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Yes, I'm on board with whatever you want to implement.
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I'll implement it.
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Well, I don't have any, you know, specific ideas.
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That's where this conversation is going Live.
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From our bed In real time.
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Let's talk about this.
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I had no idea this was coming either, so this is like a blind react.
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Yeah.
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It's interesting too, because I actually just got an email.
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I have to switch hands because your elbow keeps hitting my arm.
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Sorry.
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Stop, you're taking up the whole fucking bed.
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Okay, just for reference.
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I have one third, she has two thirds.
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That's bullshit.
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Email.
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Yes, I didn't know if you were done whining.
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Oh go ahead, let's hold hands while I call you a whiner.
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Yes, I didn't know if you were done whining.
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Oh, go ahead, let's hold hands while I call you a whiner.
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Yes, a listener emailed and his partner struggles with the spanking Because it's just not a turn on for her, and I don't know specifically what they were using for implements, but there was talk of a brush and there was also talk of him being bent over her knee.
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Now, I think that probably works for some people.
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She felt like it was more work.
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It wasn't a turn on for her.
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Sure.
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And was looking for some suggestions as to what could be done for domestic discipline or maintenance.
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The first thing that came to my mind is I don't know that I would find it a turn-on to have you bent over my knee.
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No.
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I also don't know that I would enjoy what we do as much if it wasn't the flogger or riding crop or other implement of that nature.
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Sure, I don't know that I would enjoy a brush.
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I and okay, I mean I might.
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Now that I'm thinking about it, I very well might.
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It might be a big fuck.
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Yes, I don't things could change.
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Yes, but I offered the suggestion that maybe a different implement and not bending over the knee.
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Okay, yes, yeah, for sure.
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How about a change of mindset over what it actually is?
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Yeah, I think you're going to get faster, you're going to have a faster turnaround by changing the implement.
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Here's where I think the mindset is hard to change.
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For women as we are, you know, nurturers by nature, and especially if you're a mother, it's very hard not to jump back into that motherly role and feel like you're disciplining a child, and those two don't mix.
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You know what?
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I mean you're this is like an intimate thing, right, and I think it's going to be easier to change the implement, not implying that this person used a brush on their children or you know anything like that, but society says I mean, you hear about discipline, you think of going over your knee and spanking with a brush or a belt or whatever, for sure.
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So I agree, changing the mindset is going to be the easiest to separate it, and I think that involves uh well, in our case, specifically, that has involved you offering me different perspectives You've given me different perspectives to look at this.
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Right.
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I also said that I think a game changer for me was you using one of those implements on me one time, and then I was off to the races.
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Yeah.
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Yep, I also mentioned, and then I'll stop so that you can get your thoughts in here.
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I also mentioned that after you did that to me, that one time I think I just had a.
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I'm a very visual person, so in this case I think it just kind of helped me understand.
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I think I was intimidated by how do I do this, what do I?
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What's the right way to do it.
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I was intimidated by how I go about it.
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You kind of did it to me a little bit one time and then I was off to the races.
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And now the second.
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I have a flogger or a riding crop in my hand.
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It's much like when I put a strap on, Like I feel sexy, I feel confident.
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I feel all of the dominance and control, just like it just comes right to the surface, right?
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So you're saying that if, if the wife or the girlfriend?
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Of the couple is having a hard time wrapping her head around it or understanding or whatever.
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To potentially switch roles temporarily.
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To potentially switch roles temporarily, right?
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Well, just like a, you're just physically just kind of switching the role.
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Yeah so that she gets a little taste of it to understand the male side.
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I don't know that.
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I would recommend switching roles for everyone.
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That worked for me.
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I could recommend it I was I would first suggest switching the info, switching the implement.
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Make it something different.
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That you I mean I would never have used a riding crop on one of my children, or and I mean my kids didn't even get spanked.
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So let's be real here.
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Uh, my youngest might have a couple times but switching up the implement can maybe help you differentiate.
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It can get you out of feeling like a mom.
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Sure.
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And I also think that.
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Because you're using an implement that you wouldn't have used on your kid Correct.
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Yes, that's what I'm trying to spit out.
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I understand.
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So it kind of separates it from being something that could be mixed up with.
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Right.
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It makes it harder for your mind to switch over to.
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This is like me disciplining a child, yes, and maybe it gets you out of the mindset that it feels like work or a job.
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Right understandable.
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This should be something enjoyable.
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I mean you should both, and or should you?
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I mean that's also the thing and okay.
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So the implement then is something that is only between you two so it makes it that yep, that makes that special, sure, or intimately between you two.
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Okay, yeah, yeah, for sure.
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I mean, that was that was my suggestion.
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Now, for somebody who knows that spanking is going to be a hard no for them.
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Or maybe you know maintenance things like that.
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It's so hard because we've discussed too before in the past that you know I get really turned on when I beat your ass right.
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If it's a maintenance situation.
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We've had a discussion about the headspace, right Like is your headspace going to be in a place where I'm all turned on?
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Where's your head going to be at?
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Are you going to want to have a play session?
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And I say that with air quotes because I don't know what else to call it.
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Like are you going to feel like being intimate after I've just given you maintenance spankings?
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And I know we've discussed this before.
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I don't know if that podcast is re-uploaded again- but I mean, I would say yes for you.
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I know that answer for everybody, you know I mean different people go into different mindsets.
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These are all things that you have to discuss and I also mentioned that.
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You know, for you and I in the beginning there was probably some topping from the bottom because you were more familiar with all of this and a suggestion that I would offer would be you should set up I mean, we've always solidly said you should have a certain amount of time, either each day or each week, where you sit down and talk about how you each feel like things are going.
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It's like an even playing field and I think that you have gotten good with this.
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Maybe not right away in our relationship, but once the topping from the bottom kind of came up, offering it in a different perspective for me, because you got to know me better, like what would you think, if I kind of put the ball in my court and gave me the control, rather than saying it would be so much better if you did it this way you know what I mean, rather than saying it would be so much better if you did it this way, right, you know what I mean 100%, because I mean, even at the time that I was topping from the bottom, I didn't know that that's what it was Right, I didn't know that I was doing that necessarily.
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So once that was, you know, it hit me like a brick wall, like, oh wait, okay, wait a minute.
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That's not how this goes.
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Let's rewind a little bit and talk about what you think we should implement when you get snappy McSnapperton.
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Okay.
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I mean we've had a lot on our.
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Let me just say this though I mean, like you kind of get a free pass for the last couple weeks, and I say kind of we have had a lot on our plate.
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I say kind of yeah, we have had a lot on our plate.
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There's been a lot to figure out in getting back and getting situated and, you know, making sure that the bus is going to be warm enough for us to be in negative temperatures.
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Yeah Right, there's been some challenges and stuff.
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However, but you haven't been overly snappy in the last couple weeks.
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Prior to that, though, I could 100% see what you're talking about, right?
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Right, the last couple weeks.
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No, prior to that, though I could 100, see what you're talking about, right, right, so overall, I feel like I might be wrong overall I feel like I treat you pretty good.
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I treat you as you should be treated.
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Are you waiting for I?
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I would agree with that do you need?
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Some confirmation.
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I don't know I don't know how you feel about that, but it's my intention to anyways.
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And you know that has its seasons or its it ebbs and flows.
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Ebbs and flows right.
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There's a lot of contributing factors.
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There's sometimes when I'm more conscious of it than others, but overall, it's my nature to open the door for you.
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I would agree.
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You know that's a small example, but I mean along those lines.
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Okay, but I do have, you know, my dad's snappy McSnapperton tendencies in me at times and it's not really called for you know, but it just happens.
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Let me just say the only disadvantage in our specific situation to you having a little bit of your dad's snappiness is that I have had past relationships where I was not treated well and I am a huge people pleaser and when I am reprimanded sometimes and it's not even like you're reprimanding me, but you when you snap at me like that, I just shut down and it's never productive, right.
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Like.
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I have to work on how I receive that as well, because, like I know, I know you well enough to know it's not me, you're not irritated with me.
00:19:01.622 --> 00:19:01.842
Right.
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I mean, I'm sure I do things that annoy the shit out of you.
00:19:05.667 --> 00:19:09.836
No Okay, but no Okay.