Feb. 28, 2025

0116 Female Led Relationships: Enhancing Relationship Dynamics with Submissive Rewards

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///RE-RELEASE///

In this episode, I dive into the art of rewarding your submissive partner during the holiday season. I explore creative and thoughtful ways to express gratitude, from tangible gestures like foot rubs and special outfits to emotional acknowledgments that boost self-esteem. Listeners will gain valuable insights into maintaining the delicate balance of control and appreciation, ensuring a harmonious and joyful dynamic during this festive time.

This episode is essential for anyone interested in female-led relationships and the art of rewarding submissive partners. By listening, you'll uncover strategies to nurture devotion and confidence, even amidst holiday chaos, with tips on thoughtful rewards and understanding the strength in submission. This episode is a treasure trove for those eager to enhance their relationship dynamics, featuring keywords such as female-led relationships, submissive rewards, holiday appreciation, and partner devotion.

Listener Questions:

How can I reward my submissive partner during the holiday season?
What are creative ways to express appreciation in a female-led relationship?
How do I maintain control while showing gratitude to my submissive partner?

Keywords:

female-led relationships, submissive rewards, holiday appreciation, partner devotion, relationship dynamics, creative gestures, emotional acknowledgment, thoughtful rewards, control and appreciation, festive season, partner confidence, submissive devotion, relationship harmony, rewarding gestures, appreciation strategies, unique dynamics, balance of control, partner nurturing, relationship empowerment, submissive strength

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Keywords:
domestic discipline, female led relationship dynamics, accountability, communication, people pleaser, personal growth, female led relationship challenges, discipline strategies, humor in relationships, shared growth, female led relationship advice, discipline and play, understanding in partnerships, personal anecdotes, physical touch, relationship rules, partnership growth, podcast insights, female-led relationships, submissive rewards, holiday appreciation, partner devotion, relationship dynamics, creative gestures, emotional acknowledgment, thoughtful rewards, control and appreciation, festive season, partner confidence, submissive devotion, relationship harmony, rewarding gestures, appreciation strategies, unique dynamics, balance of control, partner nurturing, relationship empowerment, submissive strength

Transcript

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I loved them more when they used to go to school.

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Just kidding Kind of.

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This podcast is intended for mature audiences only, if you are not 18 years of age or older.

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There are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18.

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This podcast is meant solely for entertainment.

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We are not licensed doctors, lawyers or therapists.

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We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and I'd love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.

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Welcome back.

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We are going to talk about the naughty and nice list.

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Ooh, it's going to be a two-episode thing this week.

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We're talking about the nice list.

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Before we get started, let's address some housekeeping.

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Let's talk about feedback.

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I am loving the feedback that I'm getting.

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I'm just curious what topics do you guys want to hear about?

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What are some things you'd like me to talk about?

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Let me know what you'd like to hear about, questions you might have that you'd like me to address.

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Whatever the case may be, I'd love to hear from you.

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Let's get down to business.

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So it's December, which means it's almost Christmas.

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Has your caged submissive been naughty or nice?

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So here's a question for all the ladies what makes your caged submissive man, nice.

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What criteria do you use?

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If I was answering this, nice would be.

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Well, my favorite nice thing is when he surprises me with chocolate, because I love chocolate.

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Sometimes he'll come home early and tell me to relax and he'll make supper.

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That's another fave.

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Her, that's another fave.

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Or just rubbing my feet without even being asked.

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Or sometimes he'll do a cash job on the side and he'll come home with a wad of cash and he'll stick it in my bra and he'll be like go shopping, get whatever you want.

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That's another fave.

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So we're going to talk about rewards for a nice subbie.

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I want to point out, as we've discussed in previous episodes, female-led relationships should have clear boundaries on daily tasks, but the female always has control, as it should be.

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A well-behaved submissive man deserves some rewards every once in a while.

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Here are some ways you can reward your submissive man.

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A few things to remember about rewarding, especially in my case.

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Most of the rewards are going to need to be kid friendly, because I have a house full of them and the little fuckers never leave me alone.

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Now, if you don't have kids in the house, it's fair game.

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I, however, don't have that luxury yet.

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I love my kids.

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Don't get me wrong, I love them a lot.

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So just a brief overview of some rewards you could do Rewards you know he likes, things he enjoys, favorite activities that you can allow him to rest, or just favorite activity, pleasurable ideas, reassurance that he's a good boy.

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So let's start with rewards you know he likes From previous experience.

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How does your partner like to be rewarded?

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Is it a gift?

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Is it physical touch?

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Is it play?

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Is it making him feel special?

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I think rewarding your submissive is important.

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I take very good care of my husband and he does a lot for me, but I show him regularly that I appreciate everything that he does.

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I think if you're in a relationship and you are not showing appreciation, whatever the dynamic is, it's going to go sour.

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Being acknowledged for the hard work that they put in and the things that they do I think is important.

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For example, if I was going to reward my subbie with something that I know he likes, it could be as simple as a foot rub when he sits down at the end of the night to relax.

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Or it could even be me wearing a specific outfit that I know he likes.

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It all depends on your relationship.

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My subbie is very turned on by my appearance.

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He has a physical reaction to me sometimes, so that in itself is kind of a reward for both of us.

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I generally have on a black tank top and jeans or whatever, and then I'll throw a hoodie over it.

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I don't really dress up much, but I don't really go anywhere anymore really, however, a reward might be me dressing up and just wearing wedge heels, wedge shoes, around the house.

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He likes my wedge shoes a lot specific toy that he enjoys or a certain thing that you do that he enjoys.

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It could be a certain role-playing thing.

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It just really depends.

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If we were going off toys, I know which toy I would use for my subbie.

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I have this fantastic toy.

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I've talked about it before, I'm quite sure it vibrates.

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Two different ends vibrate.

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There's one that goes up the bum and the other one rests right on the bottom of the balls.

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It's fantastic because it vibrates the whole ring of the cage.

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The best part.

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I control it from my phone and each part of the toy vibrates on its own.

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Even better, I can do it from anywhere, I don't even have to be close to him.

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It's one of his favorite toys, and mine too.

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We call it the button game, love it.

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So the last thing that I have.

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It says don't be afraid of satisfying his needs.

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Before yours Seems like the exact opposite of a female-led relationship the exact opposite of a female-led relationship.

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However, in regards to showing appreciation, especially if your subbie has gone above and beyond or done something extra nice, it may be worth a shot.

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Let him enjoy and have fun, do what he wants, within reason.

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Obviously, I'm not willing to give up that control, no matter how nice he is.

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However, taking a little extra time to show him appreciation and letting him relax and enjoy something that he really enjoys, that maybe we don't get to do often, would absolutely be a good reward for him.

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Another option favorite activities that allow them to rest.

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So, example is there something that you could do to give your subbie a relief from his day-to-day activities?

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The first thing that comes to mind about this is my subbie hates his day-to-day job, but his day-to-day job sucks and is super labor intensive.

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I don't think I could physically do it for a whole day for him.

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I think I would break.

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I don't know how he does it every day and I tell him frequently how much I appreciate everything he does to support his family, even kids that aren't his.

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His job is hard and I don't like it and I feel bad that he even has to do it, and hopefully he won't have to for much longer.

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If I would learn how to edit video, that might be a whole new ballgame too.

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Ugh.

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Favorite activities that allow them to rest.

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How can you help your partner get some relief from day-to-day activities?

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Are there any day-to-day activities that might be overwhelming?

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Can you give him some relief on those activities?

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Maybe not get them done yourself, but hire someone to get them done and let your partner have some rest?

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Or does your partner enjoy activities that he does not get to do often?

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Reward him with that.

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Now, remember, it's not always about kinky playtime as fun as it is, it's just not, especially in my house.

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Maybe as part of that reward, there's something, too, that you could do that just the two of you do, the two of you enjoy doing together and that you don't get to do often.

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Maybe it's something like going bowling or going out and shooting darts.

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Now, obviously, all of the above are pretty limited at this point in time, but you just have to be creative.

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Think of something that there's a thousand things that we talk about my husband and I on a daily basis, that we just don't.

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The day slips away, he ends up working late, or the kids have something going on and we're rushing here and there, or whatever the case may be.

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Just try to remember it could be something as simple as renting a hotel room for the night and just focusing on each other, and in this I mean that's kind of a reward for both of you, but I think it's important.

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You have to have some one-on-one time, pay attention to what your partner's saying, and if you have been this whole time, these rewards will be real easy.

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There's pleasurable ideas.

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One way you could reward him for being nice is try pleasing him in a different way or trying something new that he's brought up and you just haven't had the time to try.

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Maybe let your partner have a little bit more control in the relationship.

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I don't think I would like that, but I would try it once.

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Maybe switching roles that won't ever happen in our world, but that's just a preference and it's something we're both on the same page about.

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I'm not yeah, I am a controlling bitch.

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I can't even say I'm not.

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There's also reassurance that he's being good to the relationship or just being a good boy in general.

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When you're under someone's control for so long, you forget to give yourself credit for your accomplishments.

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Reassurance that your partner is doing what he is supposed to and that he is succeeding at it can bring him confidence and desire to keep being good to you.

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That's a powerful statement right there.

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I think, as I said earlier, everybody thrives off acceptance, and I don't think acceptance is the right word because it's not really acceptance, it's more praise.

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People thrive off praise.

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It's always good to hear you're doing a good job.

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It's always good to hear you're doing a good job.

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It's always good to hear that you've done a lot and you're being appreciated.

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I think this is absolutely true in a female-led relationship.

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Like I said, my subbie works very fucking hard and I am very fucking appreciative and I make it a point to tell him that as often as possible.

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In addition to that, I'm a massage therapist, which he's really getting screwed on that deal.

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I feel bad for him there.

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I feel bad for him there, but I try to massage his shoulders if I notice he's tense or, like I said, sometimes I'll rub his feet, or even just well, every night before we go to bed, we cuddle or whatever and I rub his head.

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It's in my nature to be nurturing that way to him.

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I'm very aware when something's not right with him.

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I'm very aware when he needs a timeout, when he just needs a break from whatever and needs to relax for a minute or just needs a timeout to process something that's happening.

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And I think that's very important in a female-led relationship because I think if you're not paying attention to your submissive, how he's feeling, what he's going through, he might be having a bad day that has absolutely nothing to do with you and needs to process, and in that case, maybe back the fuck off and let him have some time.

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The fuck off and let him have some time.

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I think it's important to pay attention.

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I think it's key.

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In fact, I try to be very attentive to what's going on again, because his job is so fucking labor intensive and the people he deals with on a daily basis and just be fuck faces and I just really want to make sure that when he comes home like I don't want him to be walking in the door and not happy that he's there.

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I don't want him to dread coming home.

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I want to make sure that he's happy Again, any relationship.

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Pay attention, and same goes for him.

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Most of the time he knows something's up with me before I've even realized something's up with me.

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He's very in tune with my emotions.

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He's also very catering to me.

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He's very attentive Catering maybe isn't the right word he's very attentive to me Now.

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That being said, our life is not perfect.

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I mean, it's damn close.

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I've never felt like I have a teammate like I do with him.

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Yes, I'm in control, but we tackle things together and that's the best part ever, I think.

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I think a lot.

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I should probably have a drink of Celsius, because being a submissive is not easy.

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It's not for the weak.

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Submissive is a very.

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I don't know that people really understand what submissives actually do.

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People think submissives.

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I think the general public, who doesn't really know about dominant and submissive relationships, automatically assume the submissive is weak.

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The submissive is well, weak is really the first word that comes to mind.

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But the submissive is almost the glue that holds the fucking relationship together.

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And being submissive holy fuck, that is some serious devotion.

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My subbie is 100% devoted to me.

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Anything I want or need, he will do whatever it takes to get it for me.

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He's fantastic, and I think submissives get a bad rap sometimes because, anyway, that's a rant, totally different episode.

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Anyway, being submissive is not easy and showing them your appreciation is important.

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They need to know how much they are appreciated and in turn they will desire you that much more and they will desire to serve you that much more.

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Appreciation makes you want to do better.

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Of course, the obvious reward for being nice or on the nice list would be taking the cage off.

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I'm not a fan of this one.

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I really like that cage.

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However, every now and then I like to take it off and have some fun.

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So maybe if my subbie stays on the nice list, that will be his Christmas present We'll have to see.

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So just a quick recap five things you can do Well, six if you count taking the cage off, but five different things you could do, just ideas to reward your subbie for making it on the nice list.

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One reward him with things you know he likes.

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It could even be making a meal that he likes.

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Two do something he enjoys.

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That could be an extracurricular activity, it could be a date night, it could could be anything, just something that he likes, favorite activities that allow him to rest again.

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Maybe your car needs breaks and normally he does it and you have a little extra money and you'd rather just pay somebody to do it.

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So it's off his to-do list and he can just relax.

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Not a bad idea.

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It could be something as simple as cleaning the gutters.

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Or, unless you're in the Midwest, I wouldn't fucking recommend it now.

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It's fucking cold.

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It could be anything.

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Pleasurable ideas could be his favorite role play, could be his favorite costume that you wear, or it could be a favorite toy.

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It could be anything.

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It could be a favorite toy.

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It could be anything.

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And the last one reassurance that he is being good to the relationship.

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Very important one.

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This one maybe should be done, even if it's not a nice list thing.

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You should always be reassuring your subbie and if there's something that's not right, you should be communicating with him or her.

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I tend to veer towards him because you know it's all about me and it's my podcast.

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I don't mean to be discriminatory towards anyone.

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He, she, they, them, whatever the case may be, whatever your dynamic is, communicating about how you feel things are going in your relationship will only make your relationship that much more successful.

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Six, and then obviously the extra one of maybe taking the cage off for a little bit.

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I mean it's fun, but I really like that cage.

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Rewarding your partner can be hard.

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Life gets busy, things get busy.

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It's the holiday season.

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I totally get it.

00:18:26.238 --> 00:18:28.461
I would just suggest make some time.

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Make some time for you and your submissive.

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I need to get better at this.

00:18:34.436 --> 00:18:40.826
My poor subbie is running 17 businesses Not really, but inside joke.

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Make sure before you do any of your rewards, it's something that he'll truly or she or they will truly enjoy.

00:18:48.744 --> 00:18:50.248
It will be like a real reward.

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And hey, a reward might even be a good ass whooping with a paddle.

00:18:56.445 --> 00:18:57.027
You never know.

00:18:57.708 --> 00:18:59.300
I mean I think it sounds fun.

00:18:59.643 --> 00:19:00.648
I'm not on the receiving end either.

00:19:00.669 --> 00:19:01.575
But no, I mean I think it sounds fun.

00:19:02.555 --> 00:19:03.298
I'm not on the receiving end either.

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But Next week we're going to talk about the naughty list.

00:19:06.415 --> 00:19:11.461
We're going to talk about some things that my subbie in general does that kind of pisses me off.

00:19:12.175 --> 00:19:16.902
And we're going to talk about punishments and I don't think these are going to be ass paddles.

00:19:17.984 --> 00:19:20.058
Maybe Come back and find out.

00:19:20.118 --> 00:19:20.641
Here we come in.

0116 Female Led Relationships: Enhancing Relationship Dynamics with Submissive Rewards

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