Transcript
WEBVTT
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this podcast is intended for mature audiences only if you are not 18 years of age or older.
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There are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18.
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This podcast is meant solely for entertainment.
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We are not licensed doctors, lawyers or therapists.
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We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and I'd love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.
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Welcome back to episode nine.
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Thank you so much to everyone who's staying tuned in.
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I'm so glad you're coming back and listening to future episodes.
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I have a few housekeeping issues to address.
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It's been a busy week.
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So first of all, I tried my hand at TikTok and holy shit.
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Okay.
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So posted a little video clip of me recording the TSA story in episode seven and it fucking blew the fuck up.
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It's insane how many people have viewed this video of me just talking into a microphone.
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It's insane.
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I mean it's fantastic.
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But of course with that comes backlash.
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Of course not everybody is going to like me and I'm learning that and that's okay.
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You don't have to like me.
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So the video is posted on TikTok.
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It didn't really I wouldn't say it went viral, but I went up like I don't know, 200 followers, 300 followers overnight, basically, and there was a lot of comments about consent and things being violated and whatever.
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And I just want to clarify, the title that was posted on the TikTok video was do not I repeat, do not wear a cage through TSA.
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And it was a video of me telling the story.
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So just to clarify, because this was supposed to be a helpful story and apparently it's not okay that I found some amusement in it, because I think sometimes it's funny when my husband gets humiliated because I'm a bitch like that.
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However, reached out to TSA on my Twitter and these are their responses, just for anybody who's interested, and I quote we don't have a specific policy regarding chastity devices.
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Please note that you can provide the officer with the TSA notification card to discreetly inform them of the chastity device and then it gives you a link that you can go to TSA guidelines, standards, things like that, if you have any further questions.
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And it goes on to say, and I quote However, if our equipment alarms, additional screening to include a pat-down may be required.
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If the alarm can't be resolved through the normal pat-down procedure, our officer will offer a private screening to resolve the alarm.
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Most body piercings don't require removal for screening.
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If it does cause an alarm on our screening technology, a pat-down or removal in private may be required, and again gives a link to where you can go to find their standards, rules, requirements.
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Now, the only reason that I'm bringing this up because, honestly, over the last day and a half the subject has kind of been beaten to death is I want to inform other people who participate Anticipate in chastity information so they know, when they fly either one, what to expect or two, how to avoid it.
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Now, that being said, I also would like to point out that us practicing chastity is our way of life.
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It's not scene play, it's how we live our life every day and I'm quite happy that way, and I don't have any plan on changing how I live my life with my husband anytime soon.
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So, that being said, the TSA cock cage thing has now been put to rest as far as I'm concerned.
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Put to rest as far as I'm concerned.
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If anybody has any questions, please reach out to me.
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I will do my best to answer any questions that you have or be as helpful with information as I can be.
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However, I am no longer responding to any comments regarding it unless they're a legit question.
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They're a legit question.
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Anyway, moving on, next area of housekeeping issues that I would like to address is I have had a couple Patreon members and they have kind of dropped off.
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I sincerely apologize.
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There is not a lot of content on my Patreon at this exact moment.
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There's a lot going on and I'm still learning a ton about how all of this works.
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I'm new to Patreon, I'm new to OnlyFans, I'm new to TikTok.
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I'm learning.
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There's going to be some bumps in the road and I'm really sorry if people who contributed to my Patreon felt like they got gypped.
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That wasn't my intention at all, but I do promise for those that hang in there, it will be so worth the wait.
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Oh, and also, I am going to do a photo shoot tomorrow with a good friend of mine speaking of content for my Patreon, and I'm really excited for it.
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I think the pictures are going to be fantastic.
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So hang out, see what they are.
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You'll like them.
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So this week we're going to be talking about introducing your wife or girlfriend to male chastity.
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I have some notes written up.
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I'm going to read a couple things and then I'll kind of give you my opinion as I go, and then we'll go over like five or key five elements to talking to your wife or partner or girlfriend, or whatever it is, when introducing male chastity.
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So when introducing male chastity to your partner, wife or girlfriend, you must realize that the journey must be of mutual benefit and not just to satisfy one party.
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It should not be to only cater to your fantasy of being dominated, but actively engage both parties most pleasingly.
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Performing male chastity ensures that you stand to enjoy a new and thrilling experience that gets added to your sexual gamut that tends to cover all your daily central activities and not just the ones in the bedroom.
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Discussing sex can be far from as easy as it sounds for couples or lovers, and the difficulty even increases when confessing something quite out of the ordinary like male chastity and orgasm denial, and this is why many men have been unable to let out their burning desire to ask for what they want, for what they want.
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However, using the right words and presenting it in the right way will make the idea of male chastity appealing to your wife or girlfriend.
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Here are some of the best ways to go about introducing the idea to her and avoiding the terrible shame of wanting but not getting it and any embarrassment or angst.
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Okay, so my thoughts on that I think that you have to be comfortable talking about sex and your fantasies with your partner before male chastity comes into the picture.
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Now, that being said, as you all know, if you've listened to episode one or two I can't really remember now which episode it was specifically my husband before he was my husband kind of dropped all of this in my lap right away in the beginning.
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Now, looking back, I probably wouldn't have wanted it any other way, because otherwise I would have overthought the shit out of it.
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I think it was the best way for me and he knew that to just tell me right out the gate, and he assured me that if it was something that I didn't want to participate in, he would never push me and he would be 100% happy.
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However, I wanted to live our life.
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I think, though, if you are going to discuss male chastity with your partner, you need to be in a space where you can discuss anything with them without feeling embarrassed or shy or worried about being judged.
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I think in a healthy relationship, there's no judgment, but I do know that that's not always the case.
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So the first thing know yourself.
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You have to know what your fantasies are and you have to understand what kinks you like.
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You have to know yourself very well.
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I think that's important and you have to, like I said, you have to not be embarrassed to talk about that and understanding why you like what you like and what your thoughts are on that, I think is very important.
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You want to be able to relay your message to your partner confidently and be able to provide feedback when they ask questions Similar to the first one.
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The second one is know your wife, your partner, your spouse, whatever it is, whoever you're presenting the idea of male chastity to, you want to make sure that you know them as well.
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Be sure you know their do's and don'ts.
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Tailor your approach to their do's and don'ts, tailor your approach to how you think they'll react.
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Just like I said, I think in the best case I think it was best case scenario that you know, at the time my husband just dropped it all in my lap because he knew me well enough that early on to know that I was going to overthink the fuck out of it.
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So it was best to just drop it in my lap and then move forward.
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Never did he pressure me and he only provided me with resources to research, to look into it, to read about it, to get tips on it, whatever the case may be.
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And on that note, by the time he introduced chastity to me I was like fuck, yeah, I'm on board.
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I knew with that right away.
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The third one don't make it all about sex.
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Seems kind of silly, because if you're going to participate in chastity, it's not about sex, it's about the exact opposite.
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Really, there's so much more that's involved in chastity than just the sexual aspect of it.
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Like I've said in the past, my husband is very attentive to me, cage or no cage.
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However, once that cage is on, it changes and I don't even know.
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It's like it's heightened.
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He's that much more attentive to me.
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He can anticipate my needs before I even realize that I need it.
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It's insane.
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Now we're pretty in tune to each other in general, but there's so much more involved in chastity than just the sexual aspect of it.
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You want to make sure that both parties are going to enjoy all aspects of it and I think also sitting down and discussing guidelines and you know, start out simple.
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It doesn't have to be hey, we're going to do this and we're going to do it 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year.
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I have talked to women who sometimes their husbands, boyfriends, whatever only wear it on weekends, or they only wear it to work during the day, or sometimes they wear it at night, when they're in bed it's only a nighttime thing, or from five o'clock on they have to have it on, or it's only certain days of the week as opposed to just the weekends, or they wear it during the week and then they have off on the weekends.
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I mean, you really have to customize it to your relationship and it doesn't have to be an all the time thing.
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Participating in male chastity is unique to each couple's preferences.
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I think one and this is the fourth topic, or the fourth, the fourth point avoid selling yourself short by telling her you'll bow to her every whim.
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Now, I think this is a common misconception about male chastity, especially when it's practiced all the time like we do.
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My husband absolutely does not bow to me all 24 hours a day.
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I mean, we have a normal life.
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We have and I shouldn't say normal we have a vanilla life too.
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We have children in our home.
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He's not running around the house naked with a butt plug in, and not that I wouldn't enjoy that, but the kids probably wouldn't.
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So we have our everyday routine and it's give and take.
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I mean, both of us participate in running the household.
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He works all day, so he comes home and I have supper done, or he doesn't work all day and he comes home and he makes supper.
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I mean it's a true partnership with us and I think that when you are presenting the idea of chastity to your wife, girlfriend, partner, it shouldn't be portrayed that you are going to wait on her hand and foot and be her slave.
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However, that is an enticing point of chastity.
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I mean, who wouldn't want to be waited on hand and foot?
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But there still has to be give and take in the relationship and, like I said, it isn't always going to be.
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You start out and you're doing it all day, every day.
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There has to be give and take, no matter what, and I would recommend starting out slow.
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We did not start out with him in it 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
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In fact, when we first started there was some time where he was without it for months, and we have gradually developed how we choose to live our life and now we choose to live it the way we do, which is full time.
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But I think again, it's unique to everybody's relationship and you have to know what each other's boundaries are and be comfortable with whatever you decide.
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And the final topic number five is you have to show her, don't just tell her.
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This is a big point in male chastity.
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I think as well you have to.
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I mean, in general, actions always speak louder than words and I think that's a big part of any relationship.
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It's like that saying if the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, you're not taking very good care of your grass.
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There's a lot to be said about that statement.
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I had several years where I was in shitty fucking relationships but I had no idea.
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I didn't know how a woman was supposed to be treated.
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I've totally fucking been there.
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I know I get it.
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But then you meet that one person that treats you like you should be treated, and that's where the actions speak louder than words come in.
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For example, when I met my husband the first time our first date he drove four hours round trip to take me out to lunch for one hour.
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That's more dedication than most men in my life have ever shown me, and that was our first date.
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Obviously, I was hooked from there.
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You have to be attentive to your wife, with or without a cage.
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You have to show her that you care.
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One thing that I think is important whether you have kids or whether you don't in the house or whatever the case may be, my husband and I set up one hour each day where we just catch up on each other's day, and sometimes we're bad about this, but most times we try very hard to take this time, and at Kano it's not always an hour, sometimes it just can't be an hour.
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We have kids and sports and we have other life events happening, and sometimes it just can't be an hour.
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But take at least even if it's just 10 minutes.
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Take some time, connect with your spouse, just sit and have eye contact and in my case, my husband and I are real touchy-feely.
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We like to constantly be touching holding hands, feet, touching arm touching doesn't matter.
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You just need that physical contact, a one-on-one time where you can discuss what's going on.
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It could be your day at work or it could be.
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Hey, I'm kind of having a problem with this part of our relationship.
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Communication is so important and I know I keep saying that, but I've never had a relationship where I have this much trust in another human being and I have his penis locked in a cage.
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I get that it seems totally backwards, but the amount of trust that's involved in this is insane.
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I honestly feel like I have one of the healthiest relationships I've ever had in my entire life, and to some people that might just seem crazy, because we seem crazy, but I don't care.
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I've never been happier in my life and I will promote male chastity forever.
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I love the dynamic it brings to our relationship and I fully understand it's not for everybody.
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However, if it's something that you wanna try, I really hope these five steps helped you out and, honestly, if you ever have any questions again I'm not an expert I'm more than happy to give you my thoughts or answer the questions if I can.
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Whatever the case may be, I'm here to support everyone.
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I don't pass judgment.
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Everybody has their own kinks and that's okay.
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It doesn't have to be set in stone what has to be done for each thing.
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So, to recap, five things to remember when introducing male chastity to your girlfriend, wife or partner.
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Know yourself, know your wife, girlfriend, partner.
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Whatever the case may be.
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Don't make it all about sex.
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Avoid selling yourself too short by telling her how you'll bow to her every whim.
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Show her, don't just tell her.
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Overall, I think the biggest thing is you have to have a good foundation to your relationship, trust and open communication lines, and I think that's, in general, for anything but very important for introducing male chastity to your spouse, partner, significant other, whatever the case may be.
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If, at any time, anyone has any questions wants to chat, whatever the case may be, if at any time, anyone has any questions wants to chat, whatever the case may be, reach out.
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I'm always here to support and answer any questions that I can.
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Thank you all so much for the support you've given me on my podcast.
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For the people who have had positive comments on my TikTok, I really appreciate everybody.
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I'm just so overwhelmed with all the fantastic feedback that I'm getting.
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I really appreciate you guys.
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Next week, my hubby will be back.
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I'm excited because I really really love doing episodes with him.
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They're so fun.
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Come back, join us Same time next week.
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Take care.